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$how me the Money!

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It’s Showtime in Melbourne and I decided to take on the brave mission of dragging the family to the show.  I tell you what it’s a good day out for the kids but not for the wallet and me being a tight arse I knew it was going to be a rough day.

We decided that the key to maximum enjoyment of our show experience was getting into the showgrounds early. What we hadn’t expected was that every family with a toddler decided to go early as well.

When we arrived it took us about 30 minutes to get a ticket and get through the gates. Our entry ticket which cost us a lazy $32 each did not scan and it took the very competent teenage show staff ages to work out what to do, surprisingly the solution involved actually ripping a section of our ticket and letting us go inside.

When we finally made it in, it was time for pit stop number 1. I did something that I don’t normally do and took Kid X to the disabled portaloo.  As Kid X pointed out to me straight away “there’s no toilet paper dad”. Oh please don’t let it be number 2’s, luckily it wasn’t so we were able to get out of there relatively unscathed.

We then all stared at the Show map and decided our day’s route. Hopefully we could avoid carnies. Unfortunately they were everywhere and as Kid X walked down the alley, she soaked in the noise and flashing lights. I wonder how strange it must seem to a toddler seeing Carney folk. Each one with their own unique dental issues and uniform of acid wash jeans and t-shirts.  

The carnies were desperate for Kid X’s patronage at the laughing clowns thingy. If I hear the term great family fun, one more time and everyone gets a prize I will scream. We all did our best we can’t hear you walk, our heads forward never responding to any of the carnies as if our lives depended on it.

We then managed to get to the animal nursery. This was the highlight of the show for all of us. This was actually really good. There were farm animals everywhere, walking around amongst us. Especially sheep, lots of sheep and this would be a weird precursor to actually becoming one as the crowds increased by the time we left the animal nursery.

What was strange was that adults were taking photos of the farm animals. Wow, I could have taken so many amazing shots of Daisy the cow or Aaron the Alpaca. I think adults who take photos of farm animals are like adults who wear footy jumpers to the footy, something not quite right about it.

Kid X managed to pat a sheep, lamb, duckling and goat. I think she really enjoyed this section and it took us ages to prize her away from the baby pigs display.

After this we were all stuffed. Wife A had Kid Y on her chest the whole time and was starting to tire. I was over the crowds, since when did I become so old. Crowds used to excite me know they annoy me.

We stopped and had a quick bite (don’t get me started about how $30 bucks only gets you a dodgy crepe and drink) to eat and Kid X started to have a tantrum. A tantrum that would only stop whilst I paid $10 bucks for a miniature train ride. It was on again straight after the ride finished and was on again off again until we finally relented and brought her a showbag.  Including when we got on the fire truck and she decided that we wanted me to shut the door of the truck.

Now if you haven’t been to the show for a while you better sit down when I tell you how expensive the showbags are. For a licensed showbag, aimed at the pre-schooler market (no lollies or chocolates) $25 bucks. I tell you what she better use the Giggle and Hoot Alarm clock and oversized slippers.

Then it was off to the toilet again, lucky they don’t charge you for this or Kid X would have been holding on for the whole train trip back to the city. 

Last modified on Wednesday, 26 September 2012 21:16

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