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Retro Dad

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I am writing this post in my smoking jacket whilst sitting on my Jason recliner and smoking my pipe. I have called on my wife to bring me the newspaper and my slippers. I am a Retro dad.

Yes that’s right, I am following the new trend (according to national newspapers) of going retro. Mums are doing it. We are seeing the return of retro crafts, looks and even cooking. All of these things are really cool, so I am joining in for one night. I, kind sirs, am going retro.

I just rang my bell and asked my wife to bring me a scotch and water. No luck as yet, however I am hoping they will be delivered by Retro Wife very shortly. Still no luck as I light my imaginary pipe and make that pup pup pup noise. My children walk in and yell. I advise them that I am the boss of the house and they should show me respect. Children should be seen and not heard.

“Ernie’s done a pooh, your turn” breaks me out of this daydream.

On the face of it us blokes had it good in the 1950’s and 60’s. But if you peel of the smoking jacket, not too much or you may see what I am wearing underneath, you would find it wasn’t as glossy as the little golden book I just read to Kid X would make it out to be.

Dads had little or no involvement in their kids upbringing. Kids, although well mannered, had little if any sense of self or connection with their dads and I reckon although things might seem a little bit more hectic, overall we are all more rounded individuals and are happier at home (well I am, I am not sure how I would have coped being disconnected from my kids).

Blokes have moved away from being the lord of the household and hopefully we are moving to true equality in our relationships and parenting approach, which means our families are happier too. This could be why you are not likely to see a Retro daddy anytime soon. Also most of us are crap at craft and cooking.

This article is (as usual) based on Tacklenappy’s usual extensive research methods of watching an episode of Mad Men and reading my daughters vintage Golden Book but I think I am onto something here.

Now back to my daydream and my imaginary pipe.