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Tacklenappy.com tackles pregnancy loss and father's day

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This week I started to fundraise for the annual Pregnancy Loss Australia Victorian Memorial Walkathon. PLA provide teddy bears and valuable resource packs to bereaved families.

I have been lucky enough to participate and volunteer at this event since it began 3 years ago. It's a great chance for me and Wife A, my family (especially Kid X and Kid Y) and my close friends to honour and acknowledge my stillborn son Aidan. This event falls just days before Aidan's birthdate and this makes the event even more special for us both.

I have been working hard in my spare time these last two weeks to get the Tacklenappy.com Dad of the Year award underway so we can acknowledge our best "hands on" dad on Father's day. So with the walkathon coming up and father's day too I have had lots of opportunity to think about what father's day means to me and I remember the first father's day after Aidan passed away.

Father's day was that year, in a word, shithouse. It was difficult to acknowledge the fact that Aidan wasn't here and I would not be getting my first father's day hug, first breakfast in bed, a dodgy mug (stating I am the world's greatest dad) or some tool that would sit in my shed for the next 5 years and never be used.

In fact my life at that time was a blur and days like this made me feel so bitter sweet. I was a dad but didn't really feel like one. Wife A did her best to acknowledge the day but she was hurting as much as me. We tried to keep it as low key as possible however there were too many tears for a day like this one. Each year it still hurts and even though I get those material things now, I always stop and think about what Aidan would be like and would he be able to do small things like cook toast for my breakfast in bed or run around the backyard kicking a footy commentating how he has to kick the winning goal in the grand final.

Why am I telling everyone about my experience? Well, I want people to take some time out next Sunday and think about the dads who have lost a child. These dads don't get a lot of recognition and can miss out on acknowledgement on dad's big day.

While we all celebrate (quite rightly) how wonderful we are, there are dads out there who are hurting. Although their children are not with them they are still dads. So in lots of ways next Sunday is more important to these dads.

If I could I would give all dads who have lost a child a Dad of the Year Award to acknowledge the fact that they are dads too.

To find out more about the PLA Victorian Memorial Walkathon held on 16th September at Ruffey Lake Park click here:

Last modified on Friday, 24 August 2012 18:45

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