Saturday, Oct 23rd 2021

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You are here: Home Dads' Diaries Chubba's Pool Room Bring it On - A definitive list to bring on the birth of your baby

Bring it On - A definitive list to bring on the birth of your baby

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As most of you would know both Bucky and Chubba are in the final stages of their pregnancy, sorry their wife’s pregnancy. Wife A has 4 weeks to go and Q is now overdue (get out Baby C!). Both of our lovely ladies desperately want their very pleasant pregnancies to finish and the babies to arrive. Unfortunately when they will arrive is unknown to us, although it’s likely to be occur either during our teams upcoming matches or at some obscene hour of the morning.

We want our babies to come out, because what makes a pregnant partner happy makes us very very happy. It made us think what can we do to entice the babies out? Hopefully not on a game day though.

We asked our friends on Facebook to help and we have come up with a definitive list of ways to bring the labour on:

1.Get induced – No better way of bringing on the birth of a baby than actually inducing it. Nothing gets things started quicker than some medical grade pregnancyOxytocin (Please note Oxytocin is not available at Pharmacies and please we don’t know anything about medical stuff so don’t go to your doctor and say Tacklenappy told me to get this.)

2.Eating Pineapple – I am assuming that whoever made this one up meant to eat the skin.

3.Spicy Food – (Sam) This one sounds logical to us. A hot spicy dish gets the blood pumping and if you are unlucky the stomach as well. So why wouldn’t it get other things moving along too.

4.Going for walks – (Felicity) Boring, boring, boring this does not work, especially when the footys

5.Jumping on a Trampoline – Gets everything bouncing around and hopefully helps the baby move down, until that is you jump up again then you are back where you started.

6.Driving on Bumpy Roads – There are plenty of bumpy roads around and this might be a good solution, although what if the bumpy road is far away from a hospital, we don’t fancy delivering a baby ourselves.

7.Raspberry Leaf Tea – Didn’t work last time, won’t work again, better off sticking to Lipton. Have you ever tasted that muck.

8.Watching the voice – Seal’s voice and coaching has a weird effect on me (not in a good way) and I can only imagine what it must do to a womb.

9.Plenty of Massages – (Adam) Yeah sounds like a great suggestion, I am sure both our wives could lift their games on massages for us. I quite often have tense shoulders. Hopefully the activity of giving a massage will bring on the birth.

10.Sex – (Sean) Obviously a suggestion made up by men. This one is definitely the most likely to work, although I have heard it usually takes a few goes before it starts

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