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The Good, Bad & Ugly of Kids Movies

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Kids movies. They can be the ultimate baby sitter for an hour and a bit, but they can also be the ultimate torment for a parent who’s simply seen or heard a movie so frequently that you’re ready to turn the DVD into the ultimate frisbee, flingnig it across the back fence for the neighbours doberman to play with.

Some kids movies however, even if we may not like to admit it, can be very entertaining for the parent. I’m talking Shrek, you know what I mean? I consider any movie that I remember watching as a kid as well, hence Three Men & a Baby gets a run...I decided to leave Poilce Academy out of the kids category though those movies gave me countless hours of little girly giggles.

Anyhoo, here’s my good, bad and ugly of kid’s movies. Chubba didn’t agree with this at all, do you?

The Bad - Worst Kids Movies (Top 5)

This wasn't a hard list for me to construct at all. What was hard was resisting the urge to make this the Top 35 Worst Kids Movies.

5.    Bingo - The dog that can perform CPR, build a tent, catch fish, protect against grizzly bears…come on, he’s not Skippy!

4.    Tinkerbell & the Great Fairy Rescue - I'm not sure that I can ever watch another sTinkerbell movie again.  Save me.

3.    Barbie - A Mermaid Tale - Possibly the worstattempt at an Aussie accent I have ever heard. The Aussie character is made out to be some cocky, stereotypical Bill & Ted like beach bum. It makes me angry just thinking about it.

2.    The Fairies – The Fairy Ring - Seriously, if I ran into Barnaby the Busy Buzzy Bee in the street I'd put an end to his honey making exploits. I wish Wizzy The Wizard would for once perfect a spell, the "make Wizzy turn in to stuffed olive spell" so that he'd disappear from our screens.  And Elf, you're far too talented to be with this crew, go find yourself a broadway role, or possibly a become a barista in Collins St, either way, just get off my kids TV screen.

1.    Anything with the Chipmunks in it - Don't even pretend you can tolerate these movies for more than 5 minutes. I endure enough high pitch voices around my house surrounded by three young girls, I don't need another three on the TV!

Note - I should note that we own nearly every modern Barbie movie, more fairy movies that you can stuff into an insinkerator, too many Fairy Ring DVD's and a couple of Chipmunk movies. My kids absolutely LOVE them all which I guess indicates they are successful and meet the appropriate target market. They're just not my cup of tea....I wonder if hot tea will ruin a DVD?

Special Mention

  • Any of the princess type movies where beautiful Princess meets perfect Prince, who live happily ever after…how about reality people? A lot of the time Prince or Princess turns out to be court jester and 'happily ever after' could only refer to countless days speaking to a divorce laywer.
  • Honey I shrunk the kids.
  • Home Alone.
  • Flipper (Paul Hogan & a Dolphin).
  • Look Who’s Talking / Three men and a baby (Chubba's favourites).

 

The Good - Best Kids Movies (Top 10)

 This was the hardest list to put together. I could have listed 200 movies as special mentions.

10.    E.T. - I remember loving this movie as a kid. I'm not sure why exactly, perhaps it was the hype surrounding it's release? Don't tell anybody, but as a kid I made my parents buy me an E.T. BMX bike...true story. If only I still had that bike.

9.    Rise of the Guardians - A relatively new movie and one that I can see will spawn countless sequals. The kids really enjoyed this one and have a new super hero in Jack Frost. What I didn't like? The Easter Bunny being casted as an Aussie? It's Easter Bilby you ignoramuses! If you have to have an Easter Bunny, cast some warm beer-swilling pom, cause they're the buggers that introduced bunnies into the land down under. Having said that, at least they chose the best possible Aussie to cast, our mate Hugh Jackman.

8.    Willie Wonka & The Chocolate Factory - What kid hasn't seen this movie a hundred times? Obviously the original is the best though I do think Johnny Depp did a great job, as he seems to do with the quirky characters.

7.    Star Wars - Other than the Blues Brothers, there's no movie I've seen more times than Star Wars. I'm pretty sure my first introduction to TV was the Dukes of Hazard...after that it was Star Wars all the way for many years.

6.    The Wizard of Oz - Just an out and out classic that every kid should see.

5.    Wallace & Grommit - This is probably a controversial one but the animation is first class and the stories are awesomely entertaining, if awesomely is a word. It's one of the first styles of animation any kid is introduced to so to have an exceptional example of how it can be done effectively is very important. Aardman rules.

4.    Toy Story - Perhaps this could have been higher up the list (Chubba certainly thinks so). Toy Story was one of those ground-breaking movies but my kids will always choose Barbie and Alvin and the Chipmunks over Toy Story. For me, it's take it or leave it - I enjoyed the movies but don't rate them the best of the best. What I thoguht was over the top however was the final scenes of the Toy Story 3. The kids found this too confronting, too scary and could be one of the reasons they don't want to watch the movies.

3.    Matilda - Based on a Roald Dahl book, Matilda is what a lot of little girls wants to turn into, an smart, popular kid who has a trick or two up her sleeve. It's highly entertaining and if you haven't seen it yet make sure you check it out.

2.   The Goonies - This was just one of those cult movies for me. Perhaps it was released at just the right time to suit my generation but I remember watching this one ad nausiem.

1.    Shrek - Hands down the best kids movies. Fun for all the family. Take your pick, any Shrek movie fits the bill.

Special Mention

  • The Lion King
  • Rango
  • Babe
  • Charlottes Web
  • The Labrynth
  • The School of Rock
  • The Brave
  • Nemo
  • Up
  • Who Framed Roger Rabbit
  • Despicable Me
  • Finding Nemo
  • Ice Age
  • Tangled
  • Wall-E
  • The Sound Of Music...the list goes on.

The Ugly

1.    PeeWee's Big Adventure - "I know you are but what am I?"...need I say more?

 

Last modified on Wednesday, 13 March 2013 14:35
Bucky

Bucky is a proud triple dad to three girls aged eight and under (Bookworm, Foghorn and Boo). He left the full time corporate world in late 2012 and he's not sure whether he's a SAHD or a WAHD, but either way he's spenidng more time at home with his family. Once upon a time Bucky played guitar for a garage band, now he can only play nursery rhymes.

Bucky would like to be an official chocolate, beer and scotch tester - please contact him here if you can help with this.Aussie Daddy Blogger Member

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